Letter To My Unborn Child- Volume Grass

- First of all, baby, I'd like to congratulate you for finally learning how to read…as a #boss nau you'll be the only two year old that can read a letter and understand it WELL.

- Second of all, your grandma is a fine girl, I swear

- Thirdly, there IS a God, don't ever let anyone tell you different, you want proof? Run your fingers through your beautiful hair and if that's not enough proof for you, look at my dimples

And so my letter continues…. It WILL be quick and straight to the point.

- You are the only first son of Shayo Grass, for that fact alone; I love you too much already- clearly.

- 'Cause I'm different, I won't give you do's and don'ts- however do not let anyone ever tell you that you're NOT the definition of AWESOME….Just look at the people you're surrounded by, you have me (applause) and you have my other half (applause) and 16 pairs of godparents…your peers may try and make you feel abnormal by saying nonsense like "but that does not make sense though" or "no, you're only allowed one"- best reply to that kind of stupidity? SILENCE…baby we don't mix with or have conversations with 'common' people

- My soldier, I love you and I promise to raise you with the best of everything God blessed me with. I promise to always listen to you and respect you as a human being. Everything I have is yours and I will always put you first – after God.

You'll notice that I keep mentioning this God guy- well, the Dude is a G, long story short, He made the both of us awesome in His image.

- I promise to ALWAYS have time for you no matter what it is I'm doing with my life in the era of your existence

- You will notice that I have quite an odd number of admirers; you may or may not choose to walk in my shoes however I have a strong feeling you won't have a choice- these things happen to people like us.

- #Heads-Up There will be times when I'll show up at your school just to come and look at you - you will get over it and in the process get used to it.

- Your singing lessons will begin the week after your third birthday and your drum lessons will commence the week after that.

- I know I said I won't give you dos and don'ts yet however this is another one, DO NOT EVER STRESS ABOUT ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE- this is going to become tricky when you hit puberty but I have your back. I'm working on trying to get other people in the world to understand that there's never a need but I WILL get there.

Finally, sir, never ever make anyone feel bad about their self, I will raise you better than that. I love you (get used to it, it will be said VERY often) and I can't wait till we start sharing dirty jokes, it WILL get awkward for you but seeing as you're my seed, you will be the only person I know who can match my dirty thinking skills and so prepare for that.

P.s I hope you like the song I wrote you…