'We all have a plan for our life but God's plan for us is the best'
My parents got divorced when I was still a very little kid and I had no idea of why or what lead to the divorce till date. I lived with my dad as he had his brothers and some of his employees living with. him and it was all fun and good growing up. He took care of me and also ensured that I was with my mum for at least 2 days in a week. I attended one of the best primary schools in surulere and had one of the best 'lesson teachers' as well life was good, it was fun , it was what an 8 year old kid would want but it was all about to change..
One morning my dad said he was leaving for abuja, I was used to this as he used to travel to the capital city regularly. After 3 days, we was watching the news and I saw my dad being ushered into a 'black maria' I was only 8 then but I knew only people that offended went into the black maria my uncles tried to divert my mind from pictures I saw in the news that night. I was confused. The next morning we heard loud bangs outside the house, I can't remember what these people were saying , it wasn't something pleasant. The house that used to be a happy home with smiles on everybody's face was now a complete opposite of itself my uncles looked worried, I was confused, my elder step brothers were crying. Few hours later, my maternal uncle came to pick me up when I was about to leave I remember my dad's brother telling me ' tayo be a good boy, don't stress your mummy out and remember that your dad loves you'. This was the end of my first chapter in life I wouldn't see my dad for a very long time, I moved to my mum's end. It was hard on her, she tried her best to give me everything my dad would give me, it wasn't the best time of her life , I would walk in on her crying but because I was young I didn't know why she was. I would get letters from my dad telling me how happy he is that I'm not disturbing my mum and doing well @ school. He would tell me how he was doing at 'Ghana' and at one point he wrote to me saying he moved to 'France'. At this point I knew what was going on already, I used to see his pictures in magazines and newspapers my mum tried to hide these papers from me.
One morning, my mum told me she was travelling to the Uk, I was in tears I told her 'mum I'm only 9 and you and dad would not around me anymore' she was crying to she told me not to worry that she wouldn't leave me if she knew I was not going to be taken care of. She left 2 weeks later and I was with my uncle. Although he was nice and all that he couldn't be as nice as my parents. He had his own children to. Well I was in contact with my mum on a daily basis, she would send me all sort of stuffs' I was turning 10 the next month and decided to remind her of how she promised to celebrate it for me, she said she remembered she told me things were in place for that.. Well I was exited, invitations were being sent out, arrangements were being made and everything was looking like it was going to be fun.. Well the day was finaLly here and it started out well we had fun and I received loads of presents and my dad also called me and prayed for me. It was all I wanted only that my parents were not there with me. A decade on earth, well I was alive and happy I thought to myself as I was cutting the cake. The mc said they was a surprise in store for me. I hated surprises and I was told to close my eyes . I could hear people screaming and shouted. I didn't know what was going on, I was blindfolded. When I was finally allowed to open the blindfold to see what the surprise was, it was everything I never thought it would be it was my amazing and beautiful MOTHER. I was dumbfounded, I couldn't hold it in, tears of joy tricked down my face. She was here she came home all for her son. She prayed for me and told me how much she loved me and wouldn't miss my first decade on earth for no reason.. It was my best birthday ever it was all I wanted. I would remember that day for years to come. The next day would be mother and son day. She told me how she was able to secure her british passport and her plans for both of us. I would finish secondary school and join her. She left the next week and this time I was happier than the last time she left.
Years went on and I was growing older, I was in 15 and in ss2 when I got this text. It read 'Omotayo it is me ur dad'. I didn't know what to reply, I called my mum but she didn't pick up. Later in the evening, that same number sent me a recharge card of 1,500 naira. I was tempted to call the person but he/she wouldn't pick up. My mum later called me and told me not to worry that it was nothing to be scared about. In the night before I slept I got another text message that read ' tayo its me ur dad, do u know where I am at the moment'. I replied saying 'prison' and he said 'Yes you are right in two days (sunday) my sister would bring you to where I am'. I couldn't reply , I wasn't surprised I just didn't know what to say. Sunday came and we went to visit him @ maximum prison's kirikiri. He was looking healthy and neat like he used to when we were together. We had a very short father - son convo and he told me why he waited that long before he wanted me to see him, he thought I was a little bit older and matured now. I left after 3 hours with a new wristwatch and other things.
The next year went on and I was writing my ssce, the only thing on my mind was writing my last examination and start travelling plans with my mum. I left lagos december that year and finally joined my mum after almost 7 years apart. It was that happily lived ever after story wasn't it .........
About 2 years after I was almost done with college and looking forward to uni. My mum sat me down and told me something that made me sad. She said my visa was a visiting visa and it had expired and that she wasn't able to get me a resettlement visa. I thought it was one of her funny jokes.. I laughed and I realised at one point that she was serious, this meant that I was illegal in the country and I would not be able to go to university that year. My life was collapsing right in front of me. I was confused and didn't know what to do. I started drinking and smoking. I wouldn't go for my classes at college. My mum was getting worried. I randomly destroyed things in the house. One night I woke up and saw her crying at my bed side. She said I wasn't making her happy, I told her I couldn't take It no more I'm only 18 for God's sake I shouted.. I started crying. Why did it have to be me, do I have to go through disappointments every time . I would be better of dead I shouted. This was a dark point of my life I was self destructive. I isolated myself from everybody that loved me. My best friend was weed and vodka. I told my girlfriend not to call me anymore, I hurt a lot of people but one phone call changed my life forever. It was my Imam from back home, my mum had reported to him. He talked sense into me, told me the story of prophet Ayyub (Job). I was in tears on the phone, he told me not to worry, told me to get closer to God. I was in rehabilitation mode, tried to apologise to those I hurt especially my Mum and friends. Did my best to catch up with college work and every other thing I missed out on. I wasn't completely happy tho. I knew something was missing. I prayed as hard for things to start going my way. I got a place in uni but enrolment and fees looked like impossible but I always had my mum rock solid behind me. I had hope again, the future looked brighter again and life made sense to me again.
I'm 28 now a successful business nd systems analyst. Married with 3 beautiful and amazing kids. I still face problems and difficult times but times like that define what type of person I am , like a friend once said to me ' what is life without difficulties and issues'. To everyone currently reading this and going through hard times I got one advice for you 'Pray and keep ur loved ones close'.
Dedicating this piece to all single and amazing mothers that would do anything to make their kids happy , God bless you.
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